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Illness

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Writers Club Forum :: Writers Club :: Poetry

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Illness Empty Illness

Post by BPahl88 Thu Jul 03, 2008 2:32 am

I ache in pain.
I hate this strain.
I sit and sneeze
And cough and wheeze.

I hate being ill
And I hate Nyquil.
It’s not what I need
And I hate being babied! *Looks at my mom*

I hate this condition
So I’m on a mission.
To get well soon
Come on immune! (system. It was suppoed to be immune system, but it didn't rhyme)

The next day is here
And I am all clear!
Yippey-ka-yay!
Oh happy day!

Critic is always appriciated. Very Happy
BPahl88
BPahl88
Dang, this user has a lot of posts....
Dang, this user has a lot of posts....

Male
Number of posts : 3342
Age : 28
Points :
Illness Left_bar_bleue100 / 100100 / 100Illness Right_bar_bleue

Points 2.0 : 2196
Registration date : 2008-05-19

https://writersclubforum.forumotion.com/

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Post by Hazel Thu Jul 03, 2008 2:34 am

Aw great poem! Being sick sucks and you described it well! Very Happy
Hazel
Hazel
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Number of posts : 11563
Age : 113
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Points 2.0 : 10202
Registration date : 2008-04-10

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Post by BPahl88 Thu Jul 03, 2008 2:36 am

I actually tried a different writting style this time. So something new to me. And yes, I hate being sick tongue Sicky
BPahl88
BPahl88
Dang, this user has a lot of posts....
Dang, this user has a lot of posts....

Male
Number of posts : 3342
Age : 28
Points :
Illness Left_bar_bleue100 / 100100 / 100Illness Right_bar_bleue

Points 2.0 : 2196
Registration date : 2008-05-19

https://writersclubforum.forumotion.com/

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Post by Moonlite Squire Thu Jul 03, 2008 2:38 am

Thats a really nice poem. Very Happy

I hate this condition
So I’m on a mission.

Loved it!!
Moonlite Squire
Moonlite Squire
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Number of posts : 72
Age : 29
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Points 2.0 : 11
Registration date : 2008-04-20

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Post by Moonlite Knight Thu Jul 03, 2008 2:48 am

Haha, awesome! I loved the first stanza the most. And you're right, being sick stinks Sicky
Moonlite Knight
Moonlite Knight
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Number of posts : 2031
Age : 34
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Points 2.0 : 469
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